“True Love Is Selfless. It Is Prepared To Sacrifice.” – Sadhu Vaswani
There are many forms of love. If we’re lucky, we’ll know what it’s like to have the love of family. There’s nothing like love for a sibling or parent and having the knowledge that no matter what, you’ll always be there for one another. There’s also the love we share with close friends. Even though they’re not technically family, when we love them, we treat them as if they are. In romantic love, the qualities are the same. The only difference is the added aspect of romance and wanting to share love with a person on both a physical and emotional level.
I’ve been lucky enough to be on both the giving and receiving ends of love. However, I recently realized that the only way we can truly love is when we love ourselves. You can’t give love from within if there is no love within. You may think you can, but eventually you’ll understand that you’re giving from emptiness and giving from emptiness will eventually show up as emptiness. We hear it so many times because it’s the truth. We must love ourselves first and foremost before loving anyone else.
One of the other things I’ve recently come to understand is what loving someone actually means. Loving someone, truly loving someone, is the most selfless thing you can do. Once you’re filled with self love and choose to give excess love away, you’re giving this love away to another person and you’re doing so with no expectations. When you truly love, it is strictly from the heart. When you do something from your heart, you are giving, not receiving. Giving love with the intention of getting it back is not from your heart, but from your ego. The heart is love and doesn’t need anyone or anything to reaffirm that. When you only feel satisfied when love is returned, then you’re feeling with ego. Ego is selfish. Ego makes you think others should be giving you feelings that you really should be giving yourself. It’s no one else’s responsibility to fill our own voids within. That’s completely on us.
We can love people without getting their love in return. True love is not about loving someone only if they love you back or about letting someone else determine whether or not we are deserving of their love. When we do find a person we love who has a full heart of love to give and they choose to give that love to us, that’s two people being in love. When that love is romantic, it can result in a relationship that can lead to marriage. When we have family, friends or potential romantic partners who share their love with us and we share our love with them, it’s the ultimate way of loving. It’s only when we feel we are draining our self love that we should stop giving our love to others. This can happen in an abusive relationship or when one person constantly takes all your love because they have no self love of their own. In this case, even if we truly love someone, expressing that love may not be in our best interest.
Expressing true love sometimes requires sacrificing what we want for people and letting them make their own decisions regarding their happiness. It’s accepting whatever that loved person wants. It’s not always easy because we don’t always agree on things. We accept because love is not about us, it’s about them. When you’re lucky enough to find people who love you back, they’ll show you the same. It won’t be about them, it’ll be about you. We can’t always choose who we love. Sometimes it will be joyful. Sometimes it will be sad. Sometimes it will be frustrating. Regardless of how it makes you feel, remember to be grateful. There’s nothing more beautiful than love and if you have it inside of you, be kind enough to give it to others. Listen to your heart. It will show no resistance because it has no doubt or fear. It has love. Glow & shine bright! xo